How do you use the mirror tool for self-discovery?

We all know what mirrors are good for, right? We see reflection of the object that is looking in to the mirror. Have you ever wondered how they scientifically work? Check out this fascinating explanation. If a mirror is used to reflect physical objects, wouldn’t it also be possible to reflect what is going on within ourselves? Read on to learn how the mirror tool can assist you in self-discovery and personal growth!

For me personally, this one tool has been the most powerful spiritual tool in my self-discovery journey. It can be challenging to use at first because it forces us to take radical accountability for what is going on within us. And let’s be honest, sometimes we might not like what gets revealed…shit really does stink. But continue on my friend, because it is these revelations that allow us to heal and grow.

Ok, let’s break it down!

I believe we are all light beings and divine souls and as such, we are connected to a higher power/source (you get to decide what this is for you). If each of us is connected to this higher power; then wouldn’t it make sense that we are also connected to the light of other humans? Light reflects in the mirror as explained above, so wouldn’t we then be reflecting the light of each other? When you use the mirror tool as a way to look deeper within yourself, you are simply seeing others’ actions as a reflection of yourself.

Also keep in mind that our ego does an amazing job at covering up the parts of us that we don’t want to see. As such, it is much easier to point the fingers at others, pointing blame rather than fully accepting what is going on within us. But what if…and I invite you to explore this for yourself…what if their actions are simply just a reflection of yourself?

Examples please?

Here’s an easy one. What if you are triggered by someone that is judgmental? You get so annoyed that this person criticizes, makes fun, or judges other people. How dare they judge others so easily! Aren’t you doing the same thing by judging them for their judgments?

Here’s another one that has shown up for me many times. I have noticed people close in my life to be quite standoffish. I would always assume that it was just them, justifying their actions by thinking they’re in “a mood” or it’s “that time of the month.” Again, it’s easy to point the finger at everyone else. They’re the ones at fault, how dare they act this way towards me?? But, here’s how this valuable tool assisted me in this situation. The moment I felt them standoffish, I would turn the mirror on me and see if I was doing the same thing. Guess what? Every single time, there was a part of me that was being quiet and desiring to be in my own space and/or head. Others were simply mirroring back (unconsciously) what I was doing.

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Okay, so I see the value of this tool, what do I do with it?

I simply invite you to start observing when you get annoyed with someone else’s behavior and reflect on how you are in that moment. What thoughts are going through your head? What is your body language? What emotions are you holding within? What is this annoyance teaching you about what lies within you?

Remember, this is not a judgment; it’s simply an observation. In my examples above, it was much easier to point the finger and say it’s someone else’s actions. But as I did the work using this tool and took accountability for how I was showing up, I started to notice others shift because I was shifting. Their reflection of me changed because I had changed. How do you feel about that? Does that excite you?

Be compassionate to yourself

I remind you that self-discovery is a personal journey. This is one of many tools that may allow you to rediscover yourself and kick the habits and patterns that no longer serve you. Give yourself compassion and love as you continue down this journey. 

You have the choice.

For a long time I continued to blame others for their standoffish behaviors. Ultimately, I would let my mind go crazy thinking about different scenarios of why they are not wanting to talk to me or why were they doing these things TO ME. I would go down the rabbit hole wondering if I did something wrong or worry that I should or should not be doing something.

Utilizing the mirror tool allowed me to be accountable for myself and create more connection in my relationships. I had the choice to continue the blame game or to be aware when I experienced this mirror to see where I wanted to create more connection. I realized that I had often disconnected from my relationships and shut off my communication. Rather than expressing my needs, I shut down. That’s when others reflected those actions as well. See how incredible this is?

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You, my friend, have that choice in your life. This tool can assist you in your path of self-discovery if you become aware and practice with it. 

Final note…and an important one. 

This is not an excuse for others’ actions. This tool does not make you accountable for their actions; it allows you to take accountability for your own. If others are physically and psychologically hurting you, please seek help.

More support?

Check out our blog on how to incorporate journaling into your daily life. Use it with what surfaces when you start working with the mirror tool.


Dance to Remembrance DTR Self-discovery journey

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